Characters

Amy - 20's, English, attractive, sweet, intelligent

Paul - 30, handsome, in love with Amy

Grigoriy - Russian, 30, handsome enough, but not overly charismatic, speaks no English. Chain smoker.

Kyle - 27, Paul's younger brother, a brat who has reached adulthood

Lynn - 32, Paul's older sister, another brat who has reached adulthood

Jack - 60, Paul's father, blunt, sneaky

Joan - 55, Paul's mother, short on self-knowledge, but she tries

Props
vodka bottles
a three ring binder
a pack of cigarettes and matches
suitcases
a trophy or wooden replica of a dodo bird
a Russian-English dictionary
a half gallon bottle of wine

ACT 1

SCENE 1

(A lovely mountain chalet. New Year's Eve.

It's been a long trip for PAUL and AMY. They've traveled from England and driven from the airport, through the mountains, in snow.

They stand at the door, moments before they enter the house. It's snowing. They are in the throws of a long, romantic kiss. They separate. Physically, they continue to hold each other. Mentally, they brace themselves.)

PAUL
Was there a black sheep in your family?

AMY
We loved each other.

PAUL
Underneath our response patterns, there's love.

AMY
Paul, I'm cold.

(She turns to the door)

PAUL
Wait. Just a second.

AMY
It's going to be fine.

(as if he's recounting notes for a test)

PAUL
Just realize that I'm jealous because Kyle was born. He was a sick baby and got more attention. My mother felt guilty about this and compensated by giving me too much praise. My father tries to stop it. He fears that this will damage me. Sometimes this manifests itself as anger. My mother has to go along with that, to keep the peace. But then she feels guilty and overcompensates in the other direction. One minute, she gives me too much praise, the next minute, scorn. These alternating emotions cause what appear to be sporadic responses from my father. Conflict between my parents becomes inevitable, with me in the center. This confuses me and gets me rattled. The end result is that my father favors Kyle. My sister goes along with this because it gets her more positive strokes from my father. All this - despite the fact that Kyle is good for nothing. He's a bum who gets away with anything. Of course, with everyone ganging up on me, my mother often comes to my rescue, which makes it a vicious circle that gets worse and worse. The end result can be a really nasty ordeal.

(Pause. From his heart.)

But this time, you're with me. I'm protected. At least my therapist thinks so.

AMY
What if they don't like me?

PAUL
They'll love you.

AMY
I'm not so sure. The way you describe them…

PAUL
Whoever I bring home - they like better than they like me.

AMY
They do?

PAUL
It's always like that. When I was a kid, I had some friends who were real jerks. They loved 'em. Besides, this is you. Everybody loves you.

(putting her arms around him)

AMY
There are some things about me you don't know.

PAUL
Oh yeah?

AMY
Yeah.

PAUL
What?

AMY
A lot of things.

PAUL
What?

AMY
In time. They're secrets.

PAUL
What kind of secrets?

AMY
Nice ones.

PAUL
Let's go in.

AMY
Paul?

PAUL
What?

AMY
Happy New Year.

(Another long kiss. They enter.)

SCENE 2

(Inside the house. PAUL and AMY enter. The family greets them eagerly, surrounding them, almost trapping them against the door. They stand and watch while LYNN makes the first move to greet them. She's enthused.)

LYNN
Hey!

(She gives PAUL, her brother, a hug.)

Hey! This is her! Amy.

AMY
Hi.

LYNN
(anxious)
I'll show you your room.

PAUL
Let us get these coats off.

JOAN
Wait a minute. We want to meet her.

(JOAN extends her hand to AMY.)

Hi. I'm Joan.

(KYLE shakes AMY'S hand.)

KYLE
Kyle.

(JACK, the father withholds any signs of warmth. He nods.)

GRIGORIY
Grigoriy.

(GRIGORIY smiles and shakes her hand.)

LYNN
(speaking slowly)
Grigoriy…speaks…very…little…English. He's…our…cousin…from…Russia.

AMY
(in Russian)
Nice to meet you.

GRIGORIY
Pleasure.

(they regard her)

AMY
I speak little Russian.

LYNN
You'll be downstairs. Here, I'll show you the room, and the rest of the house.

(LYNN and AMY begin to exit.)

PAUL
Here, I'll take care of these.

(AMY gives PAUL her coat and gloves. They exit.)

JACK
Where'd you meet her?

PAUL
Where'd I meet her? Well, uh, in London.

JACK
I know that. I mean, where?

PAUL
Where in London?

JACK
Yeah. Where in London?

PAUL
You don't know London.

JACK
Did you meet her in a bar?

PAUL
They're pubs.

JACK
You picked her up in a pub? Nice place?

PAUL
We met in a house, actually.

JACK
Whose house?

PAUL
I don't have to tell you that.

JACK
I thought you brought her here because you wanted us to get to know her.

PAUL
We met in a friend's house.

JOAN
Anybody we know?

JACK
How would you know him? Do you know anybody in London?

JOAN
You could have told us about him.

PAUL
I didn't.

JOAN
Then tell us about him.

PAUL
He's just somebody I knew.

JOAN
Who?

PAUL
I haven't seen you in a year and that's what you want to talk about?

JACK
Good as anything else.

PAUL
A guy I played squash with. We had a drink at his house and went out to dinner. He brought along some friends, including Amy.

JACK
What kind of restaurant?

PAUL
Curry.

JACK
What's that?

PAUL
Indian. You wouldn't like it.

JACK
Spicy?

PAUL
Very.

JACK
I'd hate it. What does he do?

PAUL
Roy? My squash partner?

JACK
Yeah. What does he do?

PAUL
What difference does that make?

JOAN
What's the matter, Paul? Your father's interested. He's not unemployed, is he?

PAUL
He's a photographer.

JACK
Portraits?

PAUL
Yeah, I guess. I don't really know. He has a studio. We play squash.

JACK
Did he take her picture?

PAUL
Amy's?

JACK
Yeah.

PAUL
I think so.

JOAN
Oh God. She's a model.

PAUL
She's not a model. I don't know why Roy took her picture.

JACK
She must be a model.

PAUL
She works in an art museum. Maybe she did some modeling on the side.

JOAN
If they were nudes I'm not so sure how comfortable I feel about her being here.

PAUL
They weren't nudes.

JACK
Have you seen the pictures?

PAUL
He's a good photographer.

JACK
You don't really know.

PAUL
I know her. She's nice. She's a very intelligent art…history…type of person. In a museum. A curator or something. She did not pose nude.

KYLE
What's so bad about posing nude?

PAUL
Nothing.

JACK
She's a stripper.

JOAN
That's disgusting.

PAUL
She's not a stripper. She's getting her doctorate in Russian art.

GRIGORIY
Russian. Da.

(Enter AMY and LYNN.)

AMY
This house is lovely.

JOAN
Glad you like it, dear.

KYLE
(skeptical)
So you play squash? You?

PAUL
Yeah. It's great.

KYLE
Doesn't the ball get real hot?

PAUL
It gets livelier as you play.

KYLE
The rackets are skinny.

PAUL
Yeah.

KYLE
Dad, you played squash, didn't you?

JACK
Handball.

KYLE
That's right. Now that hurts your hands.

JACK
You've got to be tough.

KYLE
I played a couple of times. My right hand was red as hell. Swollen. Racketball is better.

JACK
That's a sissy game for people who can't play handball.

KYLE
Squash is really sissy.

PAUL
Not really. It's more like tennis. You have to stroke the ball. It takes more skill than racketball.

KYLE
I doubt that.

PAUL
I've played both.

KYLE
Prove it.

PAUL
There's no way to prove it.

KYLE
When we get home, I'll play you in both of 'em.

PAUL
There aren't any squash courts.

KYLE
The college courts are really made for squash.

PAUL
No, those are handball courts. For squash, you have to have a line on the wall, like a net.

KYLE
They have these barriers you can use.

PAUL
I've never seen 'em.

KYLE
They're in the closet with the wrestling mats.

PAUL
Listen, I didn't come here to play squash. Didn't even bring my racket.

AMY
I call it squish.

(They ignore her.)

KYLE
If you won't play, I guess we can't prove it.

PAUL
I guess we can't.

KYLE
I think I could round up a few rackets.

PAUL
I really didn't plan to play squash here.

KYLE
'Fraid you'll get beat, huh?

PAUL
No. I'm not bad. I've had some lessons.

KYLE
Oh, you're too good for me?

PAUL
You've never played before.

KYLE
I have an aptitude for racket sports.

PAUL
Forget it. I'm not playing.

KYLE
I think you're scared.

PAUL
Whatever, Kyle.

JACK
I got a bottle of wine. Wanna glass?

PAUL
No thanks.

JACK
It's good stuff.

PAUL
No, I think I'll just relax for a bit.

KYLE
"A bit?" Did you starting saying that in England?

PAUL
It was a long trip.

JOAN
Wine could make him pass out and he'd miss the New Year.

(The family stops and regards her.)

JACK
Wanna glass of vodka? Grigoriy brought it.

GRIGORIY
Vodka. Da.

JACK
Tastes like hell.

PAUL
No thanks.

AMY
Paul.

PAUL
What?

(AMY gives him a knowing look, reminding him to use his manners. He gets the message.)

Okay, I'll have a glass of wine. How long before dinner?

JOAN
Couple of hours. Let's sit at the table.

SCENE 3

(They sit around the kitchen table drinking wine from orange juice glasses. In the middle of the table is a half gallon bottle with a screw top. GRIGORIY smokes a cigarette?)

JACK
How's the wine? You like it?

AMY
It's lovely.

LYNN
Did Paul explain the process?

AMY
I'm not sure. Paul?

PAUL
(to AMY)
There is no process.

(to LYNN)
Let's not do that this year.

KYLE
It's a tradition.

LYNN
New Year's wouldn't be the same without it.

PAUL
Couldn't we take a year off?

KYLE
No.

PAUL
I've wanted to drop it for years.

LYNN
Why?

PAUL
Why keep it? Some traditions need to end. Remember "The Lottery"?

KYLE
What lottery?

PAUL
The short story…

LYNN
…about stupid rituals. This is a family tradition. Some traditions are valuable.

JACK
Like the Seder.

KYLE
Tradition!

PAUL
What does that have to do with it?

JACK
It's a tradition. An order to the evening. Same sort of thing.

PAUL
That's an ancient tradition. With meaning. Ours is…

KYLE
…a family tradition.

PAUL
Exactly! But it's never been examined. It hasn't been refined and enriched by history.

JOAN
What's more meaningful than family?

PAUL
I'm sorry it ever started.

LYNN
I'm not. I love it.

PAUL
How did it start?

KYLE
When you dropped your pole and jumped off the ski lift and broke your leg.

LYNN
The first Dodo of the Year.

KYLE
God, things have changed. That was nothing.

AMY
Dodo of the Year?

(He shows the trophy. It could be a large dodo bird carved in wood.)

KYLE
A trophy that goes to a member of the family who does the stupidest thing that year. It's still mine. For a few more hours.

PAUL
He won last year.

LYNN
He fell off the roof and broke both of his legs.

AMY
That's horrible.

LYNN
It's stupid. He had never used a chainsaw in his life. He was cutting a limb and didn't realize that the weight of the chainsaw against the limb was holding him up. As soon as he cut through it, bam - he went down.

KYLE
(proudly)
I landed on my feet.

LYNN
I'm not so sure.

KYLE
How do you explain the broken legs?

LYNN
You also hit your head.

KYLE
Don't you think I would know?

LYNN
You were unconscious.

KYLE
I had the breath knocked out of me.

LYNN
You didn't wake up for four days.

KYLE
They doped me up in the hospital.

LYNN
Those were IV's. For food. While the swelling in your brain went down. I was there.

KYLE
So was I. The doctor didn't say anything about that.

LYNN
I think it did brain damage.

KYLE
He didn't say anything about that either.

LYNN
He didn't want to hurt your feelings. You were stupid enough already.

JACK
(to AMY, explaining)
Dodo of the Year is the main event.

(LYNN produces a large, 3-ring binder. She gives it to AMY.)

LYNN
Wanna glance at the past winners? Over twenty years of bird-brained deeds documented right here.

(She opens the notebook.)

AMY
This is quite the family history.

PAUL
(painfully)
It's all there.

AMY
(to PAUL)
How many times did you win?

PAUL
I don't know.

(She flips through the pages.)

KYLE
There are some handy capsule descriptions in the front.

PAUL
For quick review.

LYNN
(proudly)
I wrote those.

AMY
Paul: falls off a ski lift. Kyle: falls off a ski lift.

PAUL
Copycat.

KYLE
I was young.

LYNN
In retrospect, it's illegitimate. You did that on purpose.

KYLE
At least I didn't break my leg like Paul.

PAUL
You broke that other guy's arm.

KYLE
Which makes it legitimate. The lawsuit factored into it as much as the fall.

AMY
(reading the notebook)
Lynn spends a week in jail.

(pause)

What did you do?

KYLE
You had to be there.

AMY
You must have been charged with something.

LYNN
Technically, stalking.

AMY
Who did you stalk?

LYNN
Some brat who though he could play the guitar.

PAUL
Bob Dylan.

LYNN
The charges were dropped.

PAUL
There's a lot more to it than that.

LYNN
It was a big mistake. That's why he dropped the charges.

KYLE
He dropped the charges so he wouldn't have to appear in court. And because he thought keeping you in jail for a week was enough.

AMY
(reading)
Jack has mid-life crisis. Joan has mid-life crisis.

LYNN
You definitely had to be there.

AMY
(reading)
Kyle goes to college and starts wetting his bed again… Lynn spends two weeks in jail…

KYLE
Michael Jordan.

AMY
(reading)
Joan runs over the neighbor's dog…

JACK
That's not why she got Dodo of the Year. It was because after she ran over the dog, our neighbor almost choked her to death.

PAUL
I had to pull her off. She's a strong woman.

JOAN
She's not that strong.

PAUL
She was gonna kill you, Mom.

JOAN
In a fair fight, she'd be sorry. But she put that leash around my neck before I ever saw she had it.

KYLE
That woman's crazy.

JACK
You still shouldn't have killed that dog.

KYLE
The dog was a nuisance.

JACK
The dog was asleep.

LYNN
(proudly)
I called the ambulance.

KYLE
I called animal removal service.

(pause)

AMY
(reading)
Jack lost his business partner.

(pause)

He died?

PAUL
Possibly.

AMY
What's stupid about that?

JACK
Nobody knows if he died.

KYLE
We're pretty sure he's dead.

LYNN
We only know that he disappeared.

AMY
That's not stupid. It's tragic.

PAUL
We assume Dad had something to do with it.

AMY
Isn't that a rather serious assumption?

JACK
I thought so.

KYLE
You had to be there.

(AMY examines the notebook.)

AMY
Paul…is convicted for perjury. My God!

PAUL
It's not as stupid as it sounds. That's not was I was originally charged with, and I learned a valuable lesson.

AMY
What were you charged with?

PAUL
I wasn't convicted.

AMY
What was it?

PAUL
It's boring.

LYNN
Insurance fraud.

KYLE
Give him a break. He needed a new car.

LYNN
It was still stupid.

KYLE
His lawyer told him to plead the fifth and he opened his mouth.

AMY
Paul. I'm shocked.

PAUL
That was a long time ago.

KYLE
Bottom line is - he didn't get a car out of it.

(She examines the notebook again.)

AMY
Paul sleeps with his math professor…and fails the course. You did that!

PAUL
I was immature.

AMY
I would never imagine you could…

PAUL
It was off campus - with really weird circumstances - and she seduced me. Math was not my best subject. I thought it would help my grade.

KYLE
It made it worse.

LYNN
What would you have made if you had not been "seduced?"

PAUL
I had a C.

AMY
Couldn't you have told someone - if your professor really tried to "seduce" you?

PAUL
Not really.

LYNN
"Seduced" means different things to different people.

AMY
Why did she lower the grade?

PAUL
Something I said. Something I did. Who knows?

AMY
(reading)
I'm finding out a lot here. What's this? No award given in 1989?

KYLE
Nobody did anything stupid enough.

LYNN
Dad almost got it for setting the kitchen on fire. But it was an accident. The fire department got it out. We didn't think it was enough.

KYLE
We didn't want to diminish the value of the award. It was a tough decision.

JACK
But the right one.

JOAN
It certainly was.

JACK
(breaking it off, abruptly)
Would you mind reading that later? Dodo of the Year comes after the 'New Year's Revelations.'

(AMY closes the notebook.)

JOAN
And the 'What-Are-You-Thankful-For?' The evening has evolved over the years.

PAUL
It hasn't evolved. It's solidified.

JOAN
A family needs that. It's what makes a family a family.

LYNN
(to Amy)
Does your family have a program for New Year's Eve?

AMY
We used to go to go to a Greek restaurant, come home, open a bottle of campaign, and make toasts. It was a quiet, but very nice. Sometimes we talked about the past, but mostly we made resolutions for the new year. It was a nice time. Really, really nice.

KYLE
I suppose. If you like that kind of thing.

AMY
I miss it.

KYLE
You don't do it anymore?

PAUL
Her parents passed away.

JOAN
Oh, honey. I'm sorry. You're so young to be an orphan. How did they die?

JACK
Joan, please.

JOAN
I wanna know.

JACK
Can't you see she's upset.

JOAN
It's rude not to ask.

JACK
We're trying to celebrate New Years.

JOAN
She'll tell me if I get too personal. Won't you, honey?

AMY
It's okay. They…

PAUL
No, she won't. She's different from us.

JOAN
How's she different?

PAUL
She has manners.

JACK
We have manners.

LYNN
We certainly do.

KYLE
No we don't.

PAUL
She's not used to people prying into everybody else's business.

JOAN
I'm not prying.

AMY
They died in a fire. It's okay.

JOAN
A fire! How old were you?

AMY
Twenty-one.

JOAN
Isn't that horrible?

PAUL
Of course it is, Mom. But aren't you being a little insensitive?

JOAN
You're the one who's insensitive - not letting us know about these things.

KYLE
I for one think it is horrible. I think we all agree that it's horrible. Does anybody think it's not horrible?

(He waits.)
GRIGORIY
Da.

KYLE
Then let's move on. We do have a tradition here.

LYNN
(to AMY)
You'll love it.

AMY
There is a certain charm to…

PAUL
It's not charming.

AMY
It could be fun.

LYNN
It is fun.

PAUL
It's not fun.

LYNN
Don't listen to him. Let's do 'What-Are-You-Thankful-For?' before dinner. Who wants to go first? Dad?

JACK
I need a minute.

KYLE
I'll start. I'm thankful my wife and kids are happy. And healthy. And that they found a decent condo that's not too expensive.

PAUL
(subtle, but in attack mode)
You mean ex-wife.

KYLE
But not ex-kids.

PAUL
(skeptical)
When's the last time you saw 'em, Kyle?

KYLE
I see 'em all the time.

PAUL
Over the holidays?

KYLE
I see 'em.

PAUL
Once a month?

KYLE
Every two weeks.

LYNN
Supervised.

PAUL
So they've adjusted.

KYLE
Yeah. Now that they've got a place to live. Listen, whatever you do, don't marry a straight-up bitch, have kids, and get a divorce. It's hell. But now that it's over with, I'm thankful.

JOAN
I'm thankful Kyle is here, and living at home again.

PAUL
That's pathetic.

JOAN
I think it's nice. I just wish the children were here.

LYNN
Me too. Kids aren't that bad, really.

AMY
Children are wonderful.

JACK
His aren't.

JOAN
Jack. I miss them.

JACK
I don't.

LYNN
I'm thankful Paul's here.

JOAN
Me too.

JACK
How much did that plane ticket cost ya'?

PAUL
Don't remember.

JACK
You just bought it.

PAUL
Can't remember exactly.

JACK
Suddenly you're rich?

PAUL
No, I'm not rich.

JACK
If you can't remember how much you shelled out for something like that, you must be doing pretty well.

PAUL
Dad, I'm teaching. I barely scrape by.

KYLE
We're not buying plane tickets and flying all over the place.

PAUL
Neither am I. I came home for a visit.

KYLE
And spent some serious money to do it.

JACK
We paid for Grigoriy's ticket, and that was a pretty penny.

GRIGORIY
Da.

JACK
(to GRIGORIY)
Your plane.

GRIGORIY
I…am…plane.

JOAN
You're not a plane, Grigoriy. We're talking about the money.

GRIGORIY
I am money.

JOAN
No! The expense of buying your ticket.

GRIGORIY
I am ticket.

JOAN
No! We bought your ticket.

AMY
(to GRIGORIY, in Russian)
They are talking about plane tickets.

GRIGORIY
Da.

JACK
We should have let Paul pay for it. He's the one with all the money.

PAUL
It's not as much from London, but it was expensive, okay? Especially this time of year. It was important. I did some consulting on the side and saved the money.

JACK
Consulting?

PAUL
Tutoring.

KYLE
Tutoring is not consulting.

PAUL
It's a word, okay?

AMY
It sounds more professional.

KYLE
It still isn't consulting.

PAUL
Whatever. I'm here.

LYNN
And you had to buy two tickets.

KYLE
Ouch.

PAUL
I bought one.

LYNN
(to AMY)
You bought your plane ticket?

AMY
Technically.

JOAN
(to AMY)
He made you pay for your own plane ticket?

AMY
He didn't make me. I wanted to.

LYNN
Is that considered rude? In England?

AMY
No. It's practical.

PAUL
It doesn't matter. A lot of our expenses are pooled anyway.

LYNN
Is that so?

PAUL
Yeah.

JOAN
Pooled? What do you mean?

PAUL
Don't you and Dad sort of have your finances in the same sort of pot?

JACK
We're sort of different because we're sort of married.

PAUL
We're living together.

JOAN
You're living together!

PAUL
Yeah. Didn't I tell you that?

JOAN
No.

KYLE
That would have been a good one to save for the New Year's Revelations.

PAUL
It's no big deal.

JOAN
(to AMY)
Maybe it's a good thing your parents burned to death, honey.

AMY
They would have loved Paul.

JOAN
They have approved of cohabitation?

AMY
I think so.

JACK
You probably think it saves money.

AMY
It does.

PAUL
A lot.

JACK
In the short run. Wait 'til later.

JOAN
Do you still respect yourself, honey?

AMY
Oh yes.

PAUL
I'm an adult, Mom. I'm thirty years old.

JOAN
You can be a child at any age.

JACK
I've met men in their eighties who hadn't grown up yet.

LYNN
This has nothing to do with what anybody's thankful for. Paul, what're you trying to do?

PAUL
Nothing.

LYNN
You didn't have to tell them that. That's like sticking a dagger in your mother's back.

PAUL
No it isn't.

LYNN
It feels that way to her. Ask her.

PAUL
Hey! You're the one who's so crazy about this 'thankful' routine. Don't you want us to be honest? Amy and I live together. I live there, with her - not here - with all of you. It's a happy arrangement. That's what I'm thankful for.

LYNN
I'm thankful I'm not a jerk like you.

KYLE
Me too.

JACK
There's a lot to be thankful for.

JOAN
I'm not thankful for anything.

LYNN
C'mon, Mom.

JOAN
I'm not.

LYNN
(to PAUL)
See what you did.

PAUL
I didn't do anything.

LYNN
Look at her. She's not thankful for anything.

PAUL
I didn't do that.

LYNN
It's because of you.

PAUL
I can't make her thankful.

LYNN
You don't have to tell her things like that.

PAUL
Oh, I should be like you? And do lots of things I know would crush her, and not tell her about any of 'em?

JOAN
What?

PAUL
You know what I'm talking about.

LYNN
You can kiss my….

JOAN
Lynn!

KYLE
It's true. She's done some terrible things.

JACK
I don't doubt it.

PAUL
See?

JOAN
Stop this!

PAUL
Remember Tim Clinard? The off campus apartment? Living together.

JOAN
What?

LYNN
What's wrong with you?

PAUL
And Stuart Meeks? Back in Mom and Dad's bed. When they were in Israel? For a month!

JOAN
(loud)
Stop it!

PAUL
Half the time, they didn't even shut the door.

KYLE
No, they didn't.

JOAN
(louder)
I said stop!

(Pause. They wait.)

So, Grigoriy. What are you thankful for?

GRIGORIY
Da?

JOAN
Thankful.

(He holds the vodka and drinks.)

GRIGORIY
Da.

JOAN
What…are…you…thankful…for?

(He drinks again.)

GRIGORIY
Da.

(LYNN rises and attempts to explain, using a fair amount of pantomime.)

LYNN
I'm…thankful…for…

(She puts her arms around her mother's neck and gives her a kiss on the head. Her mother reacts coldly.)

…my…mother…

(She does the same with her father.)

…my…father…

(She goes to the window.)

…fresh air…

(She gestures toward the kitchen.)

…food…

(She points at the roof.)

…shelter…a house…

(Grigoriy doesn't get it. He pulls out his Russian-English dictionary.)

LYNN
Give me that dictionary.

(GRIGORIY gives LYNN his dictionary. She begins to look up thankful.)

AMY
Blagodarny.

(They stop and regard her.)

GRIGORIY
Blagodarny. Da. I thank.

LYNN
Da! Da! Blagorny.

KYLE
That's right. Blagorny.

AMY
(correcting them)
Blagodarny.

GRIGORIY
Blagodarny.

KYLE
Whatever. So what are you thankful for, Grigoriy?

GRIGORIY
Abraham Lincoln.

JACK
Abraham Lincoln.

GRIGORIY
Da. Mikhail Gorbachiev.

KYLE
Abraham Lincoln and Michail Gorbachiev. The guy's lost it.

LYNN
He doesn't understand. Grigoriy,…

(loud)

…what are you thankful for?