Scene 1

(An eight year old girl sits at a desk, writing.)

Girl

Dear Fox News.  I am eight years old.  Some of my little friends say the President is retarded.  Papa says, if you see it on Fox news, it's so.  Please tell me the truth.  Is President Bush retarded?  Signed...Virginia.

Scene 2

(A TV ANCHOR warmly addresses the camera.  He reads the reply gently, speaking to the little girl.)

Anchor

Virginia, your little friends are wrong. They have been affected by skepticism. They believe only what they see.

Yes, Virginia, the President does seem retarded.  He speaks in a slow, strange way and repeats himself.  His endearing ignorance exists as certainly as Florida voters and Iraqi military might.  Alas! how dreary would be our President if there were no ignorance to laugh at!