Daphne Forty. A teacher. Single. Not a particularly worldly woman. Volunteering at the homeless shelter over the holidays.
Stu Forty. Homeless and living at the shelter.
Harold Sixty. Director of the shelter.
Mitch Nineteen. Doing his community service time at the shelter.
Bartenders Strong guys.
The playing area is a kitchen in a homeless shelter. There's a window, upstage, that opens to an offstage dining room. The window contains a countertop, about chest level, for serving food through the window.
In the kitchen there is a stove, a refrigerator, a large cupboard, a large table in the middle. There are more tables and countertops, at normal height, around the side. There are two coffee makers and a large thermos.
Two short scenes take place outside of this kitchen. One happens beside a wall, outside the building. The other takes place at a table in a bar.
It’s a small town.
Act One takes place on December 24, 1999. The act opens around 6:00 p.m. Act Two opens exactly one week later, on December 31, 1999, at approximately the same time of day.
SCENE 1
(HAROLD, the director of the shelter, pours coffee from the carafe into a thermos.
Enter DAPHNE, carrying a dish and some bags.)
HAROLD
I made some coffee. We'll need more. We've got two of these.
(points to the coffee makers)
This thermos holds two pots. We’ll make more when we need it. We’ve got plenty of time. They drink coffee when it's cold, and tonight – it's cold. We let ‘em in at seven o’clock.
DAPHNE
Where’s the coffee?
(points to a cabinet)
HAROLD
There. Everything’s there. The filters. Sugar. Creamer. By the way, Daphne, I’m Harold, the director. We talked on the phone. Merry Christmas.
DAPHNE
Where do they go during the day, on days like this?
HAROLD
Work.
DAPHNE
They've got jobs?
HAROLD
Most of ‘em. Not all.
DAPHNE
Then after work, where do they go?
HAROLD
Here.
DAPHNE
But before they come here, there’s time in between.
HAROLD
They've got their places. The library, vacant buildings, the post office. They have friends. Families.
DAPHNE
Familes? Then why do they come here?
(pause)
HAROLD
They don’t have families like you or I've got…but some of ‘em have some place. Situations change. Some of ‘em sit in their cars until we open.
DAPHNE
They have cars.
HAROLD
Some. It's one thing to have…relatives…even a car. These are things. But a family with resources, somebody who can give you…something…solid…when you need it…a regular home. That's the big difference.
DAPHNE
I thought they were mostly winos.
HAROLD
That's changed. You say you've volunteered before.
DAPHNE
Once.
HAROLD
When?
DAPHNE
Few years ago, three or four.
HAROLD
Before there was a staff.
DAPHNE
There was a staff then.
HAROLD
A volunteer staff.
DAPHNE
I suppose it was.
HAROLD
Right. There were people, but I work here. I’m an employee, the director. It’s more organized now. We've gotten rid of that wino crowd, mostly – unless they stay sober. Back when you were here, the rule was, they couldn't come in if they were too drunk. Now…now, if we smell it, they aren't allowed in.
DAPHNE
Where do they go?
HAROLD
They either find another place, sober up, they're on the street, or they die.
DAPHNE
Die?
HAROLD
They do die. We don’t like it when they die. We’re trying to help them make it. But…the life expectancy of a guy on the street…there are places….listen, there are enough who work – women, children – to fill this place. That’s who we’re here for. Oh, some of 'em still come here, if they can keep it under control. We're not that strict, I mean, if I think a guy's had a beer but he doesn't stink, you know, if there's just a trace, I'll let him in.
(pause)
Listen, there are two main jobs here, the food and the laundry. I'll check 'em in. We take their clothes at the door and give 'em somethin' clean and dry. Then we empty the pockets and wash and dry the clothes. The dryer is slow. That job takes a while. The other job is the food. You can have your choice.
DAPHNE
I brought food.
HAROLD
That's what you told me on the phone.
DAPHNE
So I'll do the food.
HAROLD
I thought you'd say that. Fine.
DAPHNE
I brought pasta. I make good pasta.
(She pulls bags of pasta out of the grocery bags.)
HAROLD
Pasta. Huh. Not spaghetti.
DAPHNE
Tortellini.
HAROLD
I don't know about that.
DAPHNE
People…I’ve made this lots of times…people like it. The sauce is good.
HAROLD
I'm not worried about the sauce. I’m not so sure about the other….
DAPHNE
I thought about making lasagna and heating it when I got here.
HAROLD
Good thing you didn't. They wouldn't eat it.
DAPHNE
Why not?
HAROLD
Wouldn't like it.
DAPHNE
Lasagna?
HAROLD
Nope. Too fancy. Too cheesy. Too mixed up. These guys like the meat to be meat, the noodles noodles. Nothing fancy.
(pause)
Simple. That’s just the way they are.
DAPHNE
I think they’ll like this.
HAROLD
You think so?
DAPHNE
Tortellini’s very good.
HAROLD
We'll see. Tomorrow, for Christmas…turkey. One of the churches is making the whole dinner and bringing it in.
DAPHNE
Nice.
HAROLD
Special people.
DAPHNE
You working?
HAROLD
Oh yeah. Another kid coming in tonight. Community service. He should be here, but if he's late he won't get the credit.
DAPHNE
You said dinner's at seven?
HAROLD
No. They're allowed in at seven. No one allowed in after seven thirty unless they’ve been to AA. Dinner at seven thirty, goes 'til eight-thirty. If you're doing dinner you clean up too. Lights out at nine-thirty. Breakfast from six to seven. They fold their own cots and they're out by seven fifteen. You are out of here by seven forty-five.
(pause)
We’ll need more coffee. I’ll do it. Then I’ll check the parking lot, check the cots…got some time sheets I need to catch up on. The kid can do whatever you tell him. He should be here. You tell him to do whatever you need him to do…or he won’t do anything.
(HAROLD makes coffee.)
DAPHNE
I’ve got salad. Made the sauce, just need to heat it, and boil a few pots of water. Any big pots here?
HAROLD
Through that door and then the door straight ahead, there's the pantry. I don't think they'll eat the salad.
DAPHNE
It's a good salad.
HAROLD
They don't care for it.
DAPHNE
Most people like salad.
HAROLD
They like any meat and bread. Green beans is the vegetable they'll eat. Bread mostly. They like fried bread. Bacon. Got lots of bacon, plenty of bologna.
(She exits. He looks at the salad, looks at the sauce and smells it. He sticks his finger in it and tastes it. )
SCENE 2
(Moments later, DAPHNE puts a pot on the stove. Enter HAROLD and MITCH.)
HAROLD
This is Mitch. He' helping out tonight.
DAPHNE
Hi Mitch.
(Pause. He studies her.)
MITCH
Miss Mills.
DAPHNE
Uh huh.
MITCH
Remember me?
DAPHNE
I think so, but you’ve changed – haven’t you? – and I forget names. There are so many.
MITCH
You were my teacher. Journalism. Seventh grade.
DAPHNE
Why, yeah. Yes. Mitch. I didn't recognize you. How old are you now?
MITCH
Nineteen.
HAROLD
I'll keep an eye on the parking lot. Get me if you need anything.
(HAROLD exits.)
DAPHNE
People change from seventh grade, they grow up so much.
MITCH
Yeah.
DAPHNE
You were this big.
(She puts out her hand at shoulder level.)
MITCH
Yeah.
DAPHNE
But I remember you now. Remember you well.
(He looks at her, as if waiting for more, and she stops. A moment of recognition and recollection.)
So we'll be working together in here.
MITCH
Guess so.
DAPHNE
Uncanny. Didn't recognize you at all, you were such a small kid.
MITCH
Guess so.
(pause)
DAPHNE
You know where the plates are?
MITCH
Yeah.
DAPHNE
We need to get them out. The silverware is there.
(She points to it.)
We need to get out plates and silverware. I think we fill the plates when they line up. That’s what we did before. You’ve worked here before, haven’t you?
MITCH
Yeah.
DAPHNE
Here in the kitchen?
MITCH
Yeah.
DAPHNE
Then you know your way around. When’s the last time you worked here?
MITCH
Last night.
DAPHNE
You remember how many were here?
MITCH
No.
DAPHNE
Put out twenty-five or thirty plates.
(It’s a burden. He moves slowly.)
Ever had tortellini?
MITCH
No.
DAPHNE
You'll like it.
MITCH
What is it?
DAPHNE
Pasta.
MITCH
Italian?
DAPHNE
Yes.
MITCH
Uh huh.
DAPHNE
So what's the community service for?
MITCH
Ah, well, got in a little trouble.
DAPHNE
I’m sorry, but it sort of doesn’t surprise me. You gave me a hard time…in class…remember?
MITCH
Yeah.
DAPHNE
I remember…you know…I remember the earring. The earring incident.
MITCH
What earring?
DAPHNE
You don't remember that?
MITCH
No.
DAPHNE
It was big deal at the time.
MITCH
An earring?
DAPHNE
I remember it like it was yesterday. You put all those paper clips together into this earring. It was during a seminar. Giant earring. Very disruptive. Dangled down to your shoulder. You twirled it, made everybody laugh. You don't remember that?
MITCH
No.
DAPHNE
I do. I think you got suspended for it.
MITCH
No. I remember all my suspensions. Never for an earring. I forgot all about that.
DAPHNE
I also remember trying to get you to write articles for the newspaper. You wouldn't do it.
MITCH
Nope.
(She gives him several loaves of Italian bread. She gets out the lettuce and chops it.)
DAPHNE
Would you mind cutting this bread. Spread a little butter on it and put it in the oven.
(pause)
You wouldn't write.
MITCH
Not that stuff.
DAPHNE
You said you couldn't think of anything to write about.
MITCH
Sure couldn't.
DAPHNE
So what are you doing now?
MITCH
Nothing.
DAPHNE
Nothing?
MITCH
Nope.
DAPHNE
Why not?
MITCH
I don't need to do anything.
DAPHNE
How do you live?
MITCH
I live fine.
DAPHNE
No job?
MITCH
Nope.
DAPHNE
No job of any kind.
MITCH
Don't have one. Never have.
DAPHNE
Ever thought of it? A job? Since mostly everybody else works. You're a bright fellow.
MITCH
The truth is, I’ve got a career. A good one. I'm a philosopher.
(pause.)
DAPHNE
What kind of philosophy?
MITCH
Many kinds. I’m also thinking about being a writer.
DAPHNE
A writer?
MITCH
Yep.
DAPHNE
What do you write?
MITCH
Nothing yet. I’m in the thinking stage.
DAPHNE
Did you go to any college?
MITCH
No.
DAPHNE
None at all?
MITCH
Don't need to. I know more than the teachers.
DAPHNE
You do?
MITCH
Sure do.
DAPHNE
If you're serious about being a philosopher, and a writer, you should consider going to school. Learn something about it.
MITCH
Don't need to.
DAPHNE
That was a good journalism class you were in. There were some good students in it. You could have done some writing and had it published.
MITCH
Not that kind.
DAPHNE
There were a couple of troublemakers in that class too, if I remember correctly.
MITCH
Josh Baker was in that class.
DAPHNE
Oh yeah. Wonder what happened to him.
MITCH
Prison.
DAPHNE
Doesn’t surprise me. What'd he do?
MITCH
You didn't know about that? Josh murdered his grandmother.
DAPHNE
Huh? Awful! I never saw that in the paper.
MITCH
Happened in Virginia. He stole all the time, ever since I knew him. Stole from everybody. His grandma tried to stop him and he shot her.
DAPHNE
Was he stealing from her? His grandmother?
MITCH
They had a fight over her pocketbook.
DAPHNE
How old was she? Seems like he could have overpowered his grandmother without having to kill her.
MITCH
I don't know, maybe she called the police and that pissed him off. Something made him go off. He was fried, Josh. You didn’t know him.
DAPHNE
I knew him.
MITCH
In the seventh grade. He got worse in high school.
DAPHNE
I guess I was lucky.
MITCH
He didn't give a shit. She had money in the house and didn’t want Josh to have it. He didn't give a shit.
DAPHNE
So what happened to you? What's the community service for?
MITCH
It was a mix-up, really.
DAPHNE
Mix-up.
MITCH
I borrowed money, but they thought I was stealin' it. I wasn't stealin' but they wrote it up that way, said they needed to teach me a lesson, that's what the judge said, so she just gave me a hundred hours community service and a fine. Could have been worse. That judge is a bitch.
DAPHNE
Who'd you steal from?
MITCH
I was borrowing. It was a misunderstanding.
DAPHNE
Who'd you borrow from?
MITCH
My step-father.
DAPHNE
Mitch, be honest…what was your method…of borrowing?
MITCH
I got some money out of a drawer. I'm gonna give it back. I was gonna give it back. I would have already given it back. My mother didn't want him to go through with it, but he did anyway. She paid the fine with his money anyway, so he would have been better off just letting me borrow the money.
DAPHNE
How much did you take?
MITCH
'Bout a hundred dollars, plus a couple other little things.
DAPHNE
I can see why the judge would consider it stealing, if that’s what your step-father said.
MITCH
My mother didn't go along with it. She'll make him pay for this. Probably already has.
DAPHNE
Are they still together?
MITCH
Oh yeah. And I live with 'em.
DAPHNE
And he called the police?
MITCH
The bastard. He's got plenty of money.
DAPHNE
So you're a philosopher and you want to be a writer.
MITCH
Yep.
DAPHNE
What do you want to write?
MITCH
Whatever I want.
DAPHNE
Your father…didn't…I think I remember…wasn't your mother married to your step-father when you were in my class? I think I met him.
MITCH
They were together then. They were married. My real father shot himself when I was ten. I found him in the basement. Then my mother married…Richard.
DAPHNE
I met both of them, your mother and your step-father.
MITCH
Not my step-father. You never met him.
DAPHNE
I thought I remember…
MITCH
He never came to the school.
DAPHNE
Your mother’s blond, very friendly woman. Very concerned parent.
MITCH
Yeah. You never met Richard though.
DAPHNE
Your mother was worried about you.
MITCH
She’s the worrying type. Don't talk about her. She's a good person.
DAPHNE
Your grades…you almost failed my class. And your mother came in to talk about it. I’m remembering this. No – we had a conference with your mom and all your teachers. You were having a bad year. You could have failed my class, easily, but people almost never fail my class.
MITCH
She does the best she can. It's Richard who's the…well, what can you say? He's a bastard. Just a bastard. Plain and simple…a shit eating bastard.
DAPHNE
Maybe he's doing the best he can, in his own way.
MITCH
No he's not.
DAPHNE
You never know what’s true for another person.
MITCH
He's got money. My mom needs it, needs it. He's got plenty and he gets more and more stingy every day. She does the best she can.
DAPHNE
You probably miss your real father.
MITCH
Don’t remember him.
DAPHNE
You remember. You said you were ten.
MITCH
You wanna know? I don't remember him one bit. Not a bit. When I found him there in the basement, he was lookin' at me – that's all I remember…it wiped out everything else. No, I don't miss him. How can you miss somebody who does that? Somebody you don't remember. My mother would have missed him, probably, if it weren't for Richard. My brothers…they're so fucked up they don't miss shit.
DAPHNE
Okay, I guess we're ready here. I'll let this water sort of simmer, just under a boil, and in about five minutes I'll drop the tortellini in and let it cook a few minutes. Most people overcook pasta. We'll be ready to serve at seven thirty sharp.
MITCH
Mind if I go outside and smoke?
DAPHNE
It's cold.
MITCH
They make you go outside. Out the back door there's a place. Mind if I go?
DAPHNE
You'll be back to help me serve this, won't you? In five minutes?
MITCH
Yeah, I'll be back.
(pause)
So – can I go?
DAPHNE
I’ll need your help in here.
MITCH
I’ll be back. Can I go?
DAPHNE
Go ahead.
SCENE 3
MITCH spoons tortellini onto a plate and DAPHNE adds sauce. She puts bread on the plate and gives out a bowl of salad. She puts it onto the countertop for the diners in the homeless shelter to take. The countertop is about the height of a bar.
STU, one of the diners, accepts a plate from DAPHNE. He has a deep voice, acts suave, smiling, perhaps prouder than you would think, considering the circumstances.
STU
Daph, whatchu doin' here?
DAPHNE
Stu?
STU
Daph, you look good.
DAPHNE
What are you doin' here?
STU
I live here, I guess – for now. And you're doin' a little volunteer work. You're a good person, Daphne. A good person, always were.
DAPHNE
Never thought I'd see you here.
STU
Lots of things we never thought we’d see, huh? You make all this food?
DAPHNE
Yeah.
STU
You're fine, Daph, always were. In high school, you were always one of those good…well…good people – and you still are.
DAPHNE
Don't know about that.
STU
You know what I mean.
DAPHNE
I guess so.
STU
This looks real good. Right here at Christmas. Family?
DAPHNE
Pardon?
STU
You got a family? Hadn't seen you in a long time. Long time. Probably high school.
DAPHNE
My parents when to visit my sister, spend Christmas with her – she has two little children… should be fun.
STU
You didn’t go?
DAPHNE
Nope. Stayed here.
STU
Not married?
DAPHNE
No.
STU
Ever?
DAPHNE
Nope.
STU
That’s fuckin' amazing.
DAPHNE
I guess.
STU
You, as pretty as you are…always Miss Perfect. Always doing what’s right. Never got wild. Never even dated anybody, did you?
DAPHNE
No, no I didn't.
STU
This brings back memories.
(pause)
Sorry.
DAPHNE
It’s all right.
STU
Nah. I’m stupid.
DAPHNE
Why? It’s true. It’s okay.
STU
Here you are, doing Christmas charity and I'm acting like an idiot – talkin' like a guy with no class at all.
DAPHNE
No you’re not.
STU
You do lots of church work, I bet.
DAPHNE
Don't go to church. Don’t even celebrate Christmas.
STU
Damn, that's right. You’re Jewish, aren’cha?
DAPHNE
Yes.
STU
I knew that and forgot. It's been…I never went to the reunions – you?
DAPHNE
One.
STU
I'm married, three kids. Wanna see pictures?
DAPHNE
I would. But I need to get this food out.
STU
Well, sure.
DAPHNE
In a few minutes.
STU
I’ll come back later.
DAPHNE
And I'll have to wash the dishes.
STU
That's okay. Listen, Daph, want me to…let me tell you something about the food.
DAPHNE
This food? The dinner?
STU
Yeah, a tip…something to help you out. You’re new here.
DAPHNE
Sure.
STU
These guys aren't gonna like this…happens all the time. You go to all this trouble and they don’t like it. I know you're tryin' to fix something nice, but they're picky. Not me. I think it looks great. But these guys, a lot of 'em, don't like things that are different. So Harold is gonna tell you to make Bologna sandwiches, because they'll all eat those. And he's gonna tell you to make them all the same way, one slice of Bologna and one slice of cheese. They got a ton of that shit here. And these guys are gonna ask you to put mayo on one, mustard sometimes, some are gonna ask for catsup, even lettuce and tomato. Some grilled, some toasted, some on plain bread. Some of ‘em ‘ll want the bologna fried. Harold's gonna tell you to make 'em all the same way. Trust me, do what Harold says.
DAPHNE
This is better than Bologna sandwiches.
STU
Not to them. I'm tellin' ya'…they won't eat it. They like bar-b-cue, hot dogs, beef, chicken, turkey. They love meat. They’ll eat macaroni and cheese…but this…they won't eat it.
DAPHNE
I'm gonna have to start over?
STU
Except for the bread. But don't let them push you around. You've got to draw the line here, call the shots. Harold'll tell you that.
DAPHNE
I'm drawing the line. I'm making this pasta dinner. If they want a decent meal, that's what they can have.
STU
Can't draw it that straight. Gotta give 'em somethin' they can eat, but then, after that, that's where you draw the line.
DAPHNE
If you give it a try…
STU
I’ll eat your food, Daphne – but when you get to the Bologna sandwiches, draw the line.
DAPHNE
Let's just see, first. They ought to try it.
STU
That's the problem. They won't try anything new.
(Exit STU. MITCH gives DAPHNE a plate. She puts sauce on it and holds it out. After a moment, she pulls it back and puts it down in the kitchen. She looks at MITCH. They stop.)
SCENE 4
(HAROLD gives DAPHNE a large pack of Bologna, cheese, and bread.)
HAROLD
Don't give anybody a choice or you'll regret it.
DAPHNE
I think you’ve already given them a choice.
HAROLD
We have. We have.
(pause)
But let’s limit the choice or they’ll take advantage…especially of you. There'll be no end to it.
DAPHNE
Bread, Bologna, and cheese.
HAROLD
That’s it. They’re gonna want it fried – the bread and the bologna – some of ‘em ‘ll want the whole sandwich fried. Don’t fry it. When they’ve about finished, we’ll go sing a few Christmas carols.
DAPHNE
I don’t sing much.
HAROLD
Not even Christmas carols?
DAPHNE
Not really.
HAROLD
Well, if you change your mind. Right when they’re finishing up...before you do the dishes. We’ll just sing a few. Lot of ‘em enjoy that, like to join in. You don’t play the piano, by any chance?
DAPHNE
No.
HAROLD
Well, we’ve got one, but it looks like we don’t have anybody tonight who can play.
(Exit HAROLD. DAPHNE takes an order.
There could be a HOMELESS MAN behind the counter, or she could be talking through the window at an angle, so that we don’t see the person placing the order.)
DAPHNE
You want mayonnaise?
MITCH
Harold said not to.
DAPHNE
I don't see the harm in it.
MITCH
It's the rule.
DAPHNE
Sounds ridiculous. Get me the mayonnaise.
MITCH
Get it yourself.
DAPHNE
Fine.
(She goes to the refrigerator and gets out the mayonnaise. She makes a Bologna sandwich with mayonnaise.
She takes another order.)
You'd like it with tomato and no cheese? Mayonnaise?
(to MITCH)
Would you mind helping me slice some tomatoes?
MITCH
Harold says not to do it, and I'm not.
(She finds a tomato and begins to slice it.
She turns and takes another order.)
DAPHNE
Just fried Bologna on fried bread?
(She's working furiously.
Enter HAROLD.)
HAROLD
What the hell is going on?
MITCH
I told her you said not to. I'm not helping.
HAROLD
I've got some guidelines in this place.
DAPHNE
It doesn't make any sense.
HAROLD
It's the way it's done!
DAPHNE
I could use a little help.
HAROLD
I gave you help. I gave you guidelines!
DAPHNE
It's a sandwich. If we've got the food, why not let them have it?
HAROLD
That's not the point…whether we've got the food. Of course we've got food. It's the guidelines. A place like this can't operate without order. You're a volunteer, one night… I’m not here one night and then on my way. We operate three hundred and sixty-five days a year.
DAPHNE
All I'm doing, really, is adding mayonnaise.
HAROLD
I can see that.
DAPHNE
It doesn't hurt anybody.
HAROLD
It throws us off. We're already late, with this, it could throw us off half an hour. Listen, these guys get a smoke break, an hour of TV, and then it's lights out at nine-thirty. I was hoping we’d have time for a little singing. And here we are foolin' around with mayonnaise! And tomatoes! It'll never stop. You don't understand what they're like. The more you do, the more they'll ask for.
DAPHNE
So what do you want me to do?
HAROLD
What do I want you to do? What I wanted you to do is make Bologna sandwiches – and since you don't seem to be able to do that…here's what I want you to do: Nothing! Just wait! I've give them the sandwiches, and you can do nothing! When they're done, you can put on you coat and go outside with 'em during the smoke break. That shouldn't be too hard, should it? You just stand there and watch 'em smoke for ten minutes and then come back in. As cold as it is, they won't stay out long. Anybody who doesn't come back in doesn't get to spend the night. They stay out for the night. Think you can handle that?
DAPHNE
I guess so.
HAROLD
You walk outside. Wait ten minutes. Come back in. Got it?
DAPHNE
Yes.
HAROLD
I wonder about you.
DAPHNE
I'll take 'em for a smoke.
HAROLD
It's cold. Don’t do anything stupid.
DAPHNE
I can take care of it.
HAROLD
Okay, now watch this and pay attention.
(He makes and serves a sandwich.)
Bread. Bologna. Cheese. Plate. Serve. See? It's simple.
SCENE 5
(Downstage, STU and DAPHNE in the smoking area. STU smokes.)
STU
You know what I'd like? I mean, here it is, Christmas and all…you know what I'd like?
DAPHNE
You'd probably like to go home.
STU
Well, yeah. I'd like that…but that's not going to happen. You’re right, though…that’s what I’d like.
(pause)
I'll tell you about that. Believe me, that's not going to happen. But you know what I'd like, tonight?
DAPHNE
What?
STU
I'd like to take you somewhere.
DAPHNE
Huh?
STU
I'd like to take you somewhere and show you my art.
DAPHNE
You're art?
STU
Yeah. I'm an artist. I told you I wanted to show you pictures of my kids. I do. But I really want to show you my art. I'd have a good Christmas if I could do that.
DAPHNE
Well I'm sorry, but…
STU
If I had asked you out, in high school, would you have gone out with me? Now be honest, Daph – would you have?
DAPHNE
Maybe.
STU
Be honest, now.
DAPHNE
I don’t know. I was a different person then.
STU
No you weren’t. Would you?
DAPHNE
I don’t know.
STU
You never went out with anybody.
DAPHNE
No.
STU
Anybody ask?
DAPHNE
Yeah.
STU
But it wasn’t your thing?
DAPHNE
No.
STU
You had real strict parents.
DAPHNE
They weren’t that strict.
STU
There was something different about you.
DAPHNE
I don’t know what it was. I was real secure, for some reason…too secure.
STU
Would you have gone out with me?
DAPHNE
Probably not.
STU
Would you have wanted to?
DAPHNE
Maybe.
STU
You know you would. You’re scared, Daphne.
DAPHNE
Not scared, really.
STU
Sure you are.
DAPHNE
Not really.
STU
Oh, just too smart.
DAPHNE
No. That’s not it.
STU
You haven’t changed. Let’s go do something.
DAPHNE
It's not high school.
STU
No, it’s not. So why not let’s get out of here? You said your parents are out of town? Visiting your sister, with the grandchildren.
DAPHNE
Like I said, it’s not high school.
STU
See, but I'm really the same person. I am. You don't think I am, but I am. You remember who I was then? You remember me?
DAPHNE
Sure.
STU
Who was I?
DAPHNE
A guy in high school.
STU
I was somethin', wasn't I? I was somethin'.
DAPHNE
Sure you were.
STU
I was somethin’.
DAPHNE
Yeah, you were.
STU
I'd love to take you out. Just like a high school date. Just as innocent.
DAPHNE
I can't do that.
STU
You can.
DAPHNE
I'm spending the night here.
STU
You're helping with dinner and with breakfast, but nothing says you have to spend the night. Since Harold’s full-time, volunteers can go home and come back in the morning.
DAPHNE
I’m not sure about that.
STU
Check with him. That’s the rule.
DAPHNE
I don’t want to talk to Harold about the rules. And I know it’s against the rules for you to come back in.
STU
Then I won’t. It doesn’t matter. I can sleep anywhere. I come here some nights, if I need it. I don't live here. I could take you for dinner and drinks, somewhere nice, on me. And then I'll find somewhere to go.
DAPHNE
I don't think so.
STU
You're afraid I'm gonna try to spend the night with you, and I'm not. Don't accuse me of that, Daphne. I'm just sayin' it would be fun if we could go out for a few hours. That's all I'm talking about. I just want to buy you dinner and a drink.
DAPHNE
How could you do that?
STU
You don't think I have the money?
DAPHNE
If you do, why would you want to spend it on that? Save it for a place to live.
STU
That's…that's…I'll tell you about that. That's something else. I got money. Look.
(He shows her some money.)
Got paid today. Shit, you think this is enough to buy a house? Another house? Shit, I own a house. I just got a wife who won't let me sleep in it. That’s what I got. I'm tellin' ya, I could take you out for a good time. You would be happy you did. Take your mind off mommy and daddy visiting their grandchildren at Christmas. Dinner at Cino's. They’re still open. No hassles, just conversation. I used to be somethin', you know? Used to be, you know? And now I don't feel like much anymore.
DAPHNE
We just had dinner.
STU
Then dessert. And I could use a cup of Christmas cheer. We might even find a party. Probably run into people from our class. They all come back home this time of year.
DAPHNE
I don't think so.
STU
You're not a party girl, are you?
DAPHNE
Not really.
STU
That's okay. You don't have anything against a drink.
DAPHNE
I don't have anything against it.
STU
I'm not a drunk, Daphne. Honest to God, I know that's what you're thinking and I'd tell you if I was. I am not a guy who drinks more than two, three – maybe four drinks, one or two times a week. I'm not a drunk. Honest to God. I wouldn't do a thing to hurt you. I know you saw me at the shelter, and that's suspect. Anybody you meet at the shelter you should be careful with. But if you had seen me somewhere else, you’d consider it, wouldn’t you?
DAPHNE
I don’t know.
STU
You would.
DAPHNE
You don’t know that.
STU
But you'd be safe with me. You know me from before. High school. I'm just a little lonely here at Christmas and wonder if you'd join me for a drink at Cino's. That's all. That's all.
DAPHNE
Then where 're you gonna go? After the drink.
STU
I'll sleep in my car.
DAPHNE
It's too cold.
STU
No it's not.
DAPHNE
You'll die.
STU
I've slept out on colder nights than this, but I'll tell you what, if it makes you feel better, I'll go sleep on a couch at the hospital. That's where I work. Done it lots of times.
DAPHNE
You could have done that without me.
STU
Didn't think of it and didn't feel like it. Didn’t know you’d be here.
(Pause.
She decides to go.)
DAPHNE
Okay, Cino’s…separate cars.
STU
Fine.
DAPHNE
What'll Harold do?
STU
Tell him your going to Cino's with me and you'll be back to serve breakfast in the morning. Harold and I don't have a problem. Tell him we were in school together. He's okay, except if you mess up the schedule.
DAPHNE
He'll think I'm crazy.
STU
Harold's crazy. He's a good guy. He tries to help most of these guys. But you gotta…you gotta ignore most of what Harold says.
DAPHNE
You do...
STU
So you'll meet me a Cino's.
DAPHNE
I'll meet you there.
STU
You will be there.
DAPHNE
I'll be there, in a little bit.
STU
You're not gonna stand me up.
DAPHNE
No, I'll talk to Harold and come up there. I'll apologize about the food. If he tells me not to come back, I won't.
STU
He'll need your help in the morning. That shit with the food happens all the time with Harold. He's got his ways with dinner.
(self-justification)
DAPHNE
They're all…well…pretty soon they’re going to bed anyway.
STU
They sure are.
DAPHNE
So, basically, there's not much more for me to do. The dishes aren't done.
STU
What about that kid?
DAPHNE
He doesn't do much.
STU
Tell Harold. He's got to sign off on that kid's hours.
DAPHNE
I'll do the dishes and meet you there.
SCENE 6
(Downstage, DAPHNE and STU at a table at Cino's, with drinks. STU shows DAPHNE photos.)
STU
Here are my kids.
DAPHNE
Beautiful.
STU
Yep.
(Pause. She looks at the pictures.)
DAPHNE
Unbelievable.
(pause)
STU
They're great kids.
(pause)
Lot of fathers, almost all, would tell you his kids are great. Everybody thinks their kids are great. But these three are real nice. They're sweet. I mean, I'm not bragging. I know a lot of kids who are spoiled, you know?
DAPHNE
Sure.
STU
I'm not blind. These kids are all right, and it's amazing, really, because they've had a tough time. Hard lives for little kids. I didn't have to worry about the stuff they've been through. I mean, I'm the only father they have and they can't see me because of a court order. There's this guy she dates – now I'm still the husband, still the father – but there's this guy she dates who spends the night there. Now, did that kind of stuff happen in your family, when you were growing up?
DAPHNE
No.
STU
Of course it didn’t. Didn’t happen in mine either.
DAPHNE
I didn’t say it did.
STU
But here it is. That’s what’s happened to me. There's a court order that keeps me away. If I go over there, I could get locked up. She's insane. I'm married to an insane woman. I still love her. If she'd let me move back in I would. I love her, but she's insane.
DAPHNE
There must be a reason.
STU
Hell yeah there's a reason.
(pause)
DAPHNE
What's the reason?
STU
She’s insane.
DAPHNE
Another reason.
STU
Well, there is another reason, but it’s a lie. I hit her. That's the other reason – the lying reason.
DAPHNE
That's a reason.
STU
One time. I'm not proud of it.
DAPHNE
That’s the reason.
STU
I give her most all my paycheck. She gets to date other guys, have 'em sleep over. I wanted to do counseling. The judge told me to have counseling. I have nothing against it. Nothing! But don't you think she should come too? Why's it all me?
DAPHNE
I guess because…when a man hits…you say you’re the one who hit her? A man’s got the advantage. He’s stronger.
STU
So my whole life is ruined because I did that one time?
DAPHNE
Only once?
STU
Hell yeah it was only once. And it wasn't that hard.
DAPHNE
Had to be enough for the judge to issue the order.
STU
It wasn't hard, but she fell and got a bruise – from the fall.
DAPHNE
I'm sorry.
STU
I'm in a goddamn homeless shelter on Christmas Eve.
DAPHNE
How about your parents?
STU
Daddy’s been dead since…two years after we graduated. Momma died last year.
(pause)
You know, called home today…asked my wife if I could come home, just for Christmas. Just for the day. She said it wasn't necessary. I said, what wasn't necessary? She said she was talking about the presents. She had finished the shopping. I've got a full-time job, you know. I make a decent paycheck. She's used money I made to buy those presents. I said, couldn't I be a part of it? I wanna get the kids a few things, or just be a part of it? She just said it wasn't necessary, that they would be fine.
DAPHNE
You’ll miss that, the presents…but eventually, next year, maybe, you’ll…
STU
What gets me…fired –up…is the next thing she said. She said if I wanted to drop the presents off at the office – the office where she works – and leave them with the receptionist, she'd give 'em to the kids. You know, most women want to patch things up if they can. I've noticed that. They don't want to be on their own, but she wants me gone. Just gone.
DAPHNE
Sounds like she's interested in her boyfriend.
STU
That's what's behind this.
DAPHNE
Could be.
STU
I could get a lawyer.
DAPHNE
Maybe you could.
STU
Well, I've got one. I could get a different one.
DAPHNE
What's he say, your lawyer?
STU
Don't want to think about that.
DAPHNE
What?
STU
I get…angry.
DAPHNE
Is he a divorce lawyer?
STU
That's what he says. We’ll be divorced in April. No custody for me, is what he says. We met in college, my wife and I. Married seven years before we had children. Then, we started the family, had three kids, and now this.
(pause)
Another drink?
DAPHNE
Okay.
(He opens a briefcase.)
STU
Here's my art. The pictures I was telling you about.
(He pulls out a picture.)
I drew this this week.
(She looks at it.)
DAPHNE
Good. Really good.
STU
Guess what it is?
DAPHNE
Well, it's a house, the inside…the living room of a house. I like this, the way you've got the mirrors…the reflections.
STU
It's my house.
DAPHNE
Well that's…it's a nice house.
STU
It is. See that?
DAPHNE
A shelf.
STU
An empty shelf. That represents me. You see? Something's missing, and then here it is again, on the painting.
DAPHNE
Yeah, there's a painting on the wall, of this painting, and that one's got the same painting on the wall.
STU
With the same empty shelf. It’s an emptiness that never ends. The same painting inside the painting. That painting is this painting. Same empty shelf. My house with an empty shelf.
(pause)
Look at this one.
(He produces another drawing.)
DAPHNE
Your house again, from the outside.
STU
Yeah, what do you notice?
DAPHNE
Nice house. I love the, uh, the composition.
STU
See what's missing?
DAPHNE
(pause)
Well…no. Uh, yeah…the bulb.
STU
That's it. Two lights, one with a bulb missing. Like children with a missing father. That’s a theme in my art. Always something missing – a clue to the meaning.
DAPHNE
You should do something with your art.
STU
Always thought about it.
DAPHNE
You should.
STU
I should.
(pause)
Daphne.
DAPHNE
What.
STU
Daphne, why don't you and I spend Christmas Eve together?
DAPHNE
That's what we're doing.
STU
I'm mean at your house.
DAPHNE
Wait a minute.
STU
We get along.
DAPHNE
Not like that. I barely agreed to come here.
STU
We do get along.
DAPHNE
Sure. So what.
STU
I've been lonely, and I think you have too.
DAPHNE
I really haven't been. We had an agreement.
STU
Okay, I'm sorry. I'm really sorry.
DAPHNE
It's okay.
STU
I am sorry.
DAPHNE
It's okay.
STU
You think I'm a con man.
DAPHNE
No I don't.
STU
You think I'm a con man and a liar.
DAPHNE
No. Lonely. Okay? It's okay.
STU
It's just lonely, really. I'm not a con man.
DAPHNE
I know.
STU
You're sorry you came here, now.
DAPHNE
No, I'm not.
STU
You think I'm a jerk.
DAPHNE
No.
STU
But you don't want to give me shelter.
DAPHNE
No.
STU
Not even a couch.
DAPHNE
No.
STU
What would you do if I touched you?
(pause)
DAPHNE
Don't.
STU
But what would you do?
DAPHNE
I’ll get up and leave.
STU
Would you?
(pause)
DAPHNE
Yes I would.
STU
If I touched you, that’s what you would do.
DAPHNE
Yes.
(He touches her leg.)
Don't do that.
STU
Daphne.
DAPHNE
Stop.
(He pulls back his hand.)
STU
Why didn't you get married?
DAPHNE
I still might, one day.
STU
But why not, yet?
DAPHNE
That's none of your business.
STU
You think about it. I could help you think about it.
DAPHNE
We don't know each other that well.
STU
I just told you about me.
DAPHNE
You talked.
STU
Talk about yourself.
DAPHNE
I'm not going into that.
STU
You were the type of girl, I’ll bet, in high school, who’d never been kissed.
(pause)
You were.
(pause)
Maybe still hadn’t been.
(pause)
Well?
DAPHNE
I’ve told you, Stu. We’re not in high school. We don’t have to act that way.
STU
See, where's the give and take? That's your problem.
DAPHNE
You’re jumping to conclusions…misreading a lot…making mistakes.
(Again, he puts his hand on her leg. She removes it with her hand.)
Don't do that.
(Enter BAR TENDER.)
BAR TENDER
Ma'am, is he bothering you?
DAPHNE
Well...no.
STU
I'm not bothering you.
BAR TENDER
I can take care of him if you like.
DAPHNE
It's okay. I just ask him to take his hand off me.
BAR TENDER
I can fix that.
DAPHNE
It’s all right.
STU
I'm not bothering her.
(The BAR TENDER takes STU by the arm.)
BAR TENDER
Let's go.
DAPHNE
It's okay. He's really okay.
BAR TENDER
I think we’ve met.
STU
I don’t think so.
BAR TENDER
We can't have that in here.
STU
Get your hands off me.
BAR TENDER
As soon as you're outside.
(Suddenly violent, STU gets up and puts his hands around the BAR TENDER'S throat.)
STU
Take your fuckin' hands off me!
(2nd BAR TENDER enters and pounds STU in the back. He releases the BAR TENDER'S throat and tries to do battle with both of them. They wrestle him to the ground and beat him until he gives up.)
DAPHNE
You didn’t have to do that.
BAR TENDER
I’m afraid I did.
(They drag STU out.)